I really am feeling The Weight right now.
Overextended is the best word for it, and I’m running out of steam, and I feel it in every fiber of my being. It’s the knot in my throat, the sloshing in my stomach, the tightness in my shoulders, the clenched jaw, the furrowed brow, the blurred vision, my quickened breath.
And I don’t see an end in sight. There’s no light at the end of this tunnel, and it’s terrifying.
After 8 days of working non-stop, except for sleep and food and transit pretty much, I am taking a break to eat Girl Scout Thin Mint light ice cream and watch the latest Mad Men episode.
And then I’m going to go to sleep and be productive again tomorrow.
This week was rough.
I’m sure why I’m struggling to stay above water right now, but it means that tumblr is falling by the wayside.
I need to get my business in gear, and not just so that I can come back to tumblr…
(Miss you guys.)
I just have too much on my plate right now: coursework, thesis, departmental responsibilities, editing gig, volleyball, power yoga, running, dating, socializing, keeping some semblance of sanity.
My ideal evening would involve abandoning my schoolbooks in favor of food and tv in my bed.
I do not care what this says about me.
10 days to this damn half-marathon.
Today was also the first day of class for winter quarter, which meant the beginning of another round of meetings, classes, errands, work, and general stress.
For example, it’s 7:30 p.m., and I am still doing work. I just edited for four hours, and now I need to finish a 400-page book and a couple of outside articles on Parisian city planning. Then: more editing.
And I need to order books. And figure out what I’m writing my second-year paper about. And come up with some way to deal with my lack of an advisor.
This is all to say:
Exercise: Nada. Walking? To and from the train and campus? I’m going to force myself to do 20-40 minutes of yoga at some point tonight because my body and brain need it. They just do.
Weight: 149.4 lbs. Minor fluctuations. Stress. Shark week.
Feeling: Overwhelmed and exhausted and overworked already. Shit. Need to ensure more sleep and even the tiniest run.
Ah well, tomorrow’s another day.
Raising heat and “red ferocity.”
Also, a term from the text I”m reading on rural Chinese temple festivals.
Did I mention I have been doing work for 7 hours straight?
Ugh today….!
