Bitchin’.
I need to start exercising again. Like, pronto.
But before pronto comes a red velvet cupcake.
In a haze of reading and editing and protracted note-taking, in deep breathing and stretches and ground-slapping runs, in less sleep and more energy (from where, who knows?) and friends and walks and poor writing, in Lula brunch and Bourgeois Pig lunch and sandwiches for dinner, in gasping laughter and trudging melancholy and inner schism.
And in other news, there’s a ginger-haired poet in my life, and I hope he sticks for a while.
GPOYW “Spatial Theory” edition
Guess what I’m up to tonight, guys. …
If your guess was, deciphering French spatial theorists from the 1970s, then writing a paper and preparing a presentation on whatever I gleaned, then you win.
I lose.
(But first, Hot Sets starts our winter league in half an hour.)
Reasons I don’t want to run
- I’m lazy
- It’s cold outside
- And dark outside. (Soooo dark at 5pm!)
- I’m warm and happy right now on the couch
- I have to still head to Staples tonight
- It’s rush hour (lots of cars = people will see me)
- Missing one run won’t matter
- There’s always tomorrow.
Reasons…
Dammit I really need to be running.
Good thing there’s this miserable half-marathon I’m going to push out on Saturday. Even though I haven’t been on a run in like… a week. Oy.
Tonight’s volleyball, and tomorrow’s hot yoga, so those are at least activity-motion-exercise! but they’re not runs…
Snow! We have snow! Finally. Kind of a mess to be out in, but so pretty to look at.
Exercise: I went for a run, just as it started to snow. Out to the lake and back, in about 30-35 minutes.
Weight: Forgot to check. But I’m guessing… 150. Since that’s what it’s been the past couple times.
Oh, and of course, just as I was getting all psyched up to run in the snow and the cold and feel all badass…
My next half-marathon has been rescheduled for the Saturday after this one, Jan. 21. Chicago Police deemed this weekend “critically unsafe” for running a race. Laaaaame.
Exercise: Um, I walked. To/from train/house/school. I was going to run when I got home this evening, but it’s dark and I don’t like running in the dark. The cold is one thing: uncomfortable but reasonably safe; the dark is… well, it’s the dark. Also, I have so much more work than I realized and a meeting with my adviser tomorrow for which I am totally unprepared.
Weight: 150 lbs exactly. At least I’m consistent.
Okay, now I’m going to go eat all the things and start tackling my work.
Oh! Right. This. Five days until the next half. I skipped yesterday, but I don’t feel too terrible about it given that I spent a lot of time outdoors running around on Saturday.
Exercise: 40-minute run. 20 minutes of yoga. 10 minutes stretching and crunches.
Weight: 150 lbs.
Hmm. Apathy manifest in both mind and body. Sounds about right.
I can’t believe I’ll be done with my third half-marathon a week from this moment. What a crazy thing. Much as I’ll have self-doubt and self-frustration, I sometimes have to stop to remind myself that it’s great that I’ve managed three of these in six months. That I’ve made personal strides in running and academia and friendship and self-awareness. That I’ve been changing for the better. That even when I feel like I’m stagnating, I’m still putting one foot in front of the other and moving forward.
Exercise: About to go run for 30-ish minutes then meet friends for brunch. Then we’re going to play Ultimate Frisbee (/run around maniacally, since I can’t actually throw a Frisbee). Then I’ll run home. It’s not the 8-ish mile run I had planned, but social activities trump schedule. I can always run the 8 tomorrow.
Weight: 150.6 lbs. Hmmm not sure what’s going on here. But okay.
The half is a week from tomorrow. Shit.
I forgot to post yesterday, so…
Day 9
Exercise: 40-minute run. Slower than desirable. Stretched. Crunches.
Weight: Didn’t check. Oops.
Day 8
Staring down some intense body image issues today. Despite beautiful weather, the excess of work and yesterday’s slow run have prevented me from wanting to run today. Maybe I’ll run later but probably not. And there’s no way in hell I’m getting near that scale today.
I’m feeling kind of disappointed and down on myself right now. Sorry, folks.
10 days to this damn half-marathon.
Today was also the first day of class for winter quarter, which meant the beginning of another round of meetings, classes, errands, work, and general stress.
For example, it’s 7:30 p.m., and I am still doing work. I just edited for four hours, and now I need to finish a 400-page book and a couple of outside articles on Parisian city planning. Then: more editing.
And I need to order books. And figure out what I’m writing my second-year paper about. And come up with some way to deal with my lack of an advisor.
This is all to say:
Exercise: Nada. Walking? To and from the train and campus? I’m going to force myself to do 20-40 minutes of yoga at some point tonight because my body and brain need it. They just do.
Weight: 149.4 lbs. Minor fluctuations. Stress. Shark week.
Feeling: Overwhelmed and exhausted and overworked already. Shit. Need to ensure more sleep and even the tiniest run.
Ah well, tomorrow’s another day.
